Already Gone

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CZ4fkyX_Fs0

Check out the video by Kelly Clarkson--Already Gone.  It describes my life perfectly right now. 

Here are the lyrics to the song:

Remember all the things we wanted

Now all our memories, they're haunted
We were always meant to say goodbye
Even with our fists held high
It never would have worked out right, yeah
We were never meant for do or die...
I didn't want us to burn out
I didn't come here to hurt you now I can't stop...

I want you to know
It doesn't matter where we take this road
Someone's gotta go
And I want you to know
You couldn't have loved me better
But I want you to move on
So I'm already gone

Looking at you makes it harder
But I know that you'll find another
That doesn't always make you wanna cry
It started with the perfect kiss then
We could feel the poison set in
"Perfect" couldn't keep this love alive
You know that I love you so
I love you enough to let you go

I want you to know
It doesn't matter where we take this road
Someone's gotta go
And I want you to know
You couldn't have loved me better
But I want you to move on
So I'm already gone

I'm already gone, already gone
You can't make it feel right
When you know that it's wrong
I'm already gone, already gone
There's no moving on
So I'm already gone

Ahhhh already gone, already gone, already gone
Ahhhh already gone, already gone, already gone

Remember all the things we wanted
Now all our memories, they're haunted
We were always meant to say goodbye...
I want you to know
It doesn't matter where we take this road
Someone's gotta go
And I want you to know
You couldn't have loved me better
But I want you to move on
So I'm already gone
I'm already gone, already gone
You can't make it feel right
When you know that it's wrong
I'm already gone, already gone
There's no moving on,
So I'm already gone


Till next time,

Beck

How do you fix a broken heart?

My heart is broken into a million pieces  I am trying so hard to "just move on" as everyone says.  It is just so painful.  I told Jake to move out on Friday.  I just felt tired of feeling like the only reason he was here was for a free place to stay.  I didn't feel loved or appreciated.  I hated all the fighting.  I was resentful for the things he didn't do and should have done and it created more tension between us and so finally it boiled over until I could take it no more and I told him I wanted him out.  I want to be with someone who loves me with all of their heart, who wants to marry me, have a family with me, help me and be my partner in life, laugh with me, and grow old with me.  Jake and I were not going towards those things and so it was time for us to move on.  I still love Jake and I hope that we both find happiness.  One of the hardest things about this break-up is how it will affect Payton.  I do not want him hurt in all of this.  I know my time with him will be less and it tears me up inside because I love him so much.  He is like my own child and that is how I think of him.  I hope that we continue to have a relationship beause it would really hurt me if we did not.  I know that I have lots of friends and family who will help me through this.  I also know that now more than ever is the time when I need to stay strong in my faith and lean on the Lord because he can and will bring me through it. 

Till next time........


Beck